sayings i live by; exist by:

"have your cake and eat it too".

"everything will be okay in the end. if it's not okay, it's not the end."

problems of the priveleged. i gots 'em.
such as, i cut my hair short (it was such a huge step) and it looked great when the lady straightened it and put all this product on it after, but on the 2nd day, after i took a shower? it ain't lookin' as hot. sigh sigh.
working for my dad three days a week; means i can't play at UCLA because those darn nerds take tests on thursdays and fridays and the days i work are monday tuesday and wednesday :(
somehow don't have time to go to the gym, which i feel is a huge waste of my money! and i got fat on missions.
but anyway
life is
pretty
darn
good

i hate hate hate my insecurities. even after i try to logically reason them out; soothe them; simply slip into oblivion to forget them; why do they never go away
Jesus, i need You to help me
'cos i don't have enough strength on my own.

i think happy people are so boring.

politics?!
sigh mark sanford
bringing shame to republicans everywhere
an arena of disappointment
but i still want to enter it someday
i want my world to lie beyond beach hangouts

i think you're angry at me because i have the opportunities that you don't.
i have my dreams too, and the determination to see them come true.
it's not like i voluntarily ask others to inquire about my future plans; they just do.
it's not my fault.

just some random thoughts
in life
it's not the thought that counts
maybe you have the thought, but that doesn't count for anything
it doesn't give you any credibility
until you actually do it.

oh my goodness. i have hardly ever experienced revelations of such epic proportions. God, you are SO good.

they say that college is freedom. for the first time in your life, there's no mom that comes creeping around telling you to get off oovoo, no dad around to monitor your snacking, no curfews, no rules. you can basically do whatever you want, whenever you want.

but what is true freedom? it is only found in Jesus Christ. no longer being a slave to your sins; your insecurities; the chains that have dragged you down for so long you feel like you don't have the strength left to fight. being free of the crushing weight of others' opinions and expectations because your identity is found in Him. not comparing yourself to others, because in His eyes you are unique and infinitely precious. being released into forgiveness when you stumble. knowing that you are weak; but that it is not your strength that can help you keep on going, it is His strength alone.

oh man. that's a freedom far greater than the ones you'll be faced with in college.

help me, Jesus. I can't do it, but you can.