whoopee!

so today i officially got accepted into the metro ministries fall 2009 internship! i am definitely excited and more than a little relieved. metro ministries is basically an urban youth ministry located in bushwick, brooklyn. they run "sidewalk sunday schools" almost every day of thje week in an attempt to reach out to the community and preach the gospel. praise God!

but i found another opportunity to go to china for three months...hmmm....

i feel like i'm never satisfied! i always need adventure!

but i feel like i've gone such a long way to even be considering china as a possible destination in my future. for a long time, i hated being asian. when i first came to diamond bar, everything disgusted me: cue, fobs, the way everyone was totally ignorant regarding world/political events, the stupid chinese restaurants that my parents dragged me to (btw, i still loathe chinese food: i hate ' new capital'!)

but then i realized that they were just representations of the selfish, material culture that characterizes asians in diamond bar, or perhaps just diamond bar kids in general.

i recently read an article that talked about the duties of asian americans to their home countries, particularly in regards to chinese americans and china. the first missionaries in china were white. even today, many of the people serving there are of a different race: many koreans have recently started ministering there.

i feel drawn to china because in a way, i feel like that it is my "cultural duty", my "cultural calling." i may travel to any country in the world; all the places that i want to go: romania, poland, rwanda, uganda, bolivia, brazil: and do ministry. and it will be life-changing, sure. and in the same vein, a white person can go to china to do ministry and change lives also. but there is no question that i, as a chinese american, have a huge advantage over someone of a different race if i do decide to serve in china.

first of all, i speak the language.

second of all, i know the culture. though i grew up around white people in my school district, through church i developed a keen sense for the way asians think and the unique way eastern values shape their approach to Christianity and even their responses to the gospel message. i would go so far as to say that it isn't something that can be learned, from an outsider's perspective. it's something you have to be born into.

third of all, my looks. though the sight of a foreigner may be attention-grabbing at first, there is no doubt that, at least in china, chinese people trust other chinese people infinitely more. even if they're american born and raised, as i am.

will my road eventually lead me to china? i hope so! and for that, i thank diamond bar. though it hasn't been a perfect four years, it has taught me to appreciate and most importantly, value my culture as both something beautiful in itself and an effective advantage for spreading the gospel to the largest population on earth.